SELF LOVE

I am enough

SELF LOVE

Between my first surgery in 2015 and a few months after my second surgery in 2018, I was depressed. I had lack of motivation, low self confidence and some days I just couldn't see the point in life. I guess its kind of understandable, being in constant pain and seeing no end to it, is really quite hard.

I was also super unhappy and self conscience of my body and self image. Because of the pain in my spine I struggled (& still do) to exercise... this meant I gained stretch marks on my hips, cellulite on my bum and legs along with an untoned stomach. Along with those things I now have a 12 inch scar down my spine. But its that 12 inch scar that changed my outlook on my body. I realised that my scar was unique to me. It tells a story of what I have been through and overcome. And its the same with my stretch marks and cellulite (and all of my many other imperfections). So early January, this year, I decided 'enough is enough'. I decided 'new year, new me' (cliché I know). I decided to change my mind set completely.

How did I do this?

I realised that I no longer cared what everyone else thought about the way I look after being at my all time low. Straight after my second 7 hour gruelling spine surgery, I didn’t look great. I had been lying on my face for the duration of the surgery and as a consequence my face was the size of a balloon! I couldn’t move, I had a catheter in & the nurses bed bathed me for the entirety of my hospital stay (SHOUT OUT to the amazing medical staff at Leeds General Infirmary Hospital, this blog is partly down to you). Despite the state I was in, my family showed up everyday with no judgement, just with pure love and care. They didn’t care about what I looked like. My family, my boyfriend, my dogs and friends all love me for being me. They don't care about the scar down my back or the stretch marks on my hips (and i'm sure your loved ones feel the same about you & your imperfections!).

Think about it. Think about the person you love most in the world... would you love them any less if they all of a sudden got stretch marks? Put on a bit of weight? Was in a tragic accident that caused them to become disabled? If your answer is YES, then unfortunately I think you're in the wrong place. But if your answer was NO, then you're in the right place and we're going to get on just fine. 

You love your loved ones unconditionally. You love the way they make you laugh. You love the way they make you feel. You love them for being them.

& guess what... those are the exact same reasons why they love you. They love you for being YOU! 

So its time to step up and take charge. Worry less about irrelevant people's opinions. Worry more about yourself and your love ones. And most of all... Start. Loving. YOU!

LP x